Tuesday, October 11, 2011

A letter home to family

What a week it has been! On Tuesday I had an interview with my mission President which was quite interesting. The tendency for me in my life has been that as I have an interview with someone of high ranking in the church I tend to get nervous, just my foolish nature I suppose. I used to do it with Bishop Cannon until our relationship grew to be a true friendship. So before I went in I told myself that I was going to show him the true colors of my personality, that is laugh uncontrollably if I think something is funny, cry if I am sad, ask for help if I need help. As we began to talk I felt heavy. I had had a long week and was a bit discouraged with where I was spiritually. I told him that I was feeling a decline of desire. That I felt I had some how plateaued spiritually for the moment  and that I could be doing better. I love President Sorensen because he is a listener. He asked me a few questions and then began to expound the Doctrine and Covenants to me. All in all I left the meeting feeling pretty much the same way, but I left with his encouraging advice. He told me to write a vision of myself, and to be that vision at least until the end of the transfer and to "drink deeply" from the scriptures every chance I get. At his counsel I wrote up a vision of myself and I have spent the free minutes that I do have reading the scriptures and a few great things have come to  my mind. Above all else I came to the realization that I was setting expectations for myself, that great as they may be, were for my betterment and not solely focused on the people I serve. I have a hope that by the time I return home I will be a more refined human being, more holy, more humble, and more loving. All of these things come with time and are the natural result  of serving others. I have realized that I need not worry about becoming something for 2013. I need to be in tune with the spirit on a day to day basis and all other things will come.

 My brother Kiefer wrote me a letter this week that really made my thoughts come full circle as he explained to me that his mission papers are now in and how grateful he was to be following the gospel. He told me how I need to be easier on myself ( a note of advice that I have heard from countless others). He told me if I labored all my days and baptized a single soul on my mission that it would be worth it (something I remember myself saying before my mission). And what really touched my heart and re-kindled the flame was how we expressed to me his gratitude for how I brought him into the gospel.

A few days later I received a letter from a young woman I have never met. She said that she attends Snow College and that she had heard stories of an "un-named" young man from Brother Scott who had gone through struggles to find his way and ultimately made it on a mission. She said that un-named person had come up a month prior in a lesson from her "Miracle of Forgiveness" class and how she felt a strong impression to seek my name and information and write me, an impression she didn't follow through on. She said that a month later she was having a lesson on "sins of omission" and that she had the same strong impression. So she wrote me a 3 page letter sharing her struggles, her prompting of the spirit to write me me and lastly her encouragement and testimony. Her advice and encouragement were identical to the counsel given by my mission president, that of going with all struggles and cares to the scriptures. These experiences really strengthened me this week. I have received so many kind words and gifts from my friends and families, that have proved to me another level of love that I didn't realize previously existed. After receiving gifts in the mail this week from both my mother and father that touched me and warmed my heart I was reminded by the spirit that if my earthly parents love me and know how to answer to my needs, how much more does my Heavenly Father have for me. This is true for all of us. He is going to grant all of the things he has promised. If we have a high vision of ourselves, he has one higher for us. His love is made manifest to me in the plainest and sometimes strangest of ways. Of all the wrong that I do, the great is being forgetful. I have so much to remember and in turn to be grateful for.

 I am blessed to have this outlet of sharing my feelings with you each week. I have made it a point that I want to always be genuine in how I feel, especially with the ones I love. If the words that come from my heart seem heavy , know that I too feel light so much. I am being supported to this work. I love the people. I feel the spirit and when I am discouraged peace is ALWAYS provided. Our Heavenly Father is intimately and individually aware of His children. Like the song says, "count your blessing and it will surprise you what the Lord has done". In the unfortunate case that any of you find yourselves asking "how has the Lord shown his love for me?", and you can't see your family, your friends, your food, shelter and clothes. If you are a lot like me and forget. Let us go to the scriptures and read about the atonement which is the greatest example of how the Lord has shown his love for us. I believe in Christ. He is the bed-rock of my soul. I wish I had the words and capacity to explain what He means to me. I love you all so much and I thank you for the love you share with me and for being a family I can confide in weekly.

 We are so blessed!

 Love, Elder Prince

No comments: